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Finding true love is a tall task. Many people search their whole lives, never to find it. There’s definitely no one secret to finding true love, so I won’t pretend there is. However, I do think there are some things we can do to encourage ourselves to find love. But first, a little bit about my story.

When I was searching for love in my life, I did everything I could. It was before the days of popular dating apps, or else I would have spent a lot of time on those. At one point, I did have a few profiles on some of the early online dating websites, as I was eager to find love wherever it may be.

I went out with friends, I went on lots of dates with guys that could have been a good fit, and I prayed and prayed to find someone right for me. For a while, I regularly got a free love tarot reading. I went to a psychic every week for a bit, and was simply doing everything I could.

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However, my journey toward finding love required me to step back and take some different action. The things I had to do in order to make everything work out were not what I expected in those days. It wasn’t a matter of me not seeking hard enough. Instead, it was a matter of me not being truly ready.

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Steps I Took to Find Love

First, we need to make time for self-care. I was not actually caring for myself living this way. I spent all my time focused outward, on finding the right person. Although I was a relatively healthy person who exercised and ate well, I really had no self-care routine at all. This was an important part of my journey.

Next, I needed to let go of my idea of what true love was. I was so focused on what I had in my head, I couldn’t possibly be open to reality. I had an image of a man, his passions, and his style. I had an image of our relationship, our love, and life together. Instead, by opening up to see what may arise and letting the control go, I allowed myself to experience what was really present.

Finally, I stopped making my social life center around meeting the right person. Instead of going to the places with my friends where I thought I could meet someone, I turned some of my energy and focus away from true love for a bit. Instead, I built other relationships, met guys here and there, and went about my life. It wasn’t that I gave up. I just wasn’t obsessing, and instead allowed myself to have a thriving social life.

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